hey jude sirius black
by faeriesqueen
Summary: "and anytime you feel the pain hey Jude, refrain don't carry the world upon your shoulders." [ updates every saturday ]
1. 1

"I'm gonna bloody kill him," Jude growled pulling the hems of her skirt, her hair a wet mess glued on her face and the shirt now see-through curled on her skin. "I'm gonna find him and kill him with my bare hands," she kept going, walking so fast both Marlene and Dorcas struggled to keep up with her.  
"Isn't this a bit too much?" Dorcas asked, her breath short as she apologized to the people the girl in front of them accidentally hit. "I mean, he deserves it, but it's not very convenient for you," she added quickly, and Marlene shoot her a questioning look. She shrugged and pouted slightly.  
"I don't care –" the girl turned around a pointed a finger against Dorcas' chest. "He could've sent me on the other side of the forest or on the highest tower of the Castle, but what he _said_ to Lily," something like a snarl left her lips and she turned back again, her hair still sticking to her face. She removed it almost violently and marched through the corridors, the two girls following her short after – she almost slipped on the stairs as she walked to the Ravenclaw's Common Room. "Go check on Lily, I'll be back soon," she said to the others before entering the room and almost slamming the door behind her and in the face of the poor boy who had opened to her.

When she got out she was still fixing her hair, tied in a little ponytail at the base of her skull with just a few locks free to fall on her face that she quickly tucked behind her ears, and looking down she accidentally bumped into someone and had to take a few steps back not to fall.  
"You okay, Mendoza?" the boy asked and, lifting her gaze, she met Sirius Black's eyes and the little grin painted on his lips. "That was a nice dip you made out there," he added and his grin widened a bit. In that moment, Jude wanted to punched him in the face.  
"Get out of my way, Black," she mumbled, bumping into his shoulder as she walked past him to head towards the Griffyndor's Common Room. He quickly grabbed her arm to stop her and called her with a sweet tone she'd never heard him use. _Jude._ He had never called her Jude, it was always _Mendoza_. "Take that hand off me _now_," she curled her lips annoyed and looked up at him, ignoring the little jump her stomach made when she noticed how close they were.  
"Why are you mad at me?" he asked, but nonetheless moved his hand from her and took a little step back, giving her space. "I'm not the one who sent you into the lake, am I?" he continued, cocking his head and arching both his brows.  
"_No mames_," she hissed before crossing her arms on her chest – the guy couldn't help but laugh, but Jude decided to ignore him. "If you and your friend hadn't started annoying that idiot maybe, _maybe_, things would've gone differently," she turned again and reached the top of the stairs muttering to herself.  
"Jude," he called again kindly and she froze, her shoulders still in his direction. She felt him getting closer and tried not to move as he distractedly played with the edge of her little ponytail. "I'm sorry, for both you and Lily – and James's too, but he's too scared to approach you because you seemed like you might've chopped someone's head off," he scoffed a little laugh and moved to her side, letting his arms fall again at his sides. She snorted and rolled her eyes before looking at him for a second too much.  
"I will, and for as much as I think you've been a couple of idiots it won't be yours, so you can reassure Potter," she said and started getting down the stairs to go to Lily. She released her hair from the ponytail and bit her bottom lip, still ignoring the way her stomach twisted.  
"Hey, Jude," his voice got up a little and she turned midway, frowning. "You know you can call us with our names, right?" he asked with a little laugh. She curled the tip of her nose and shrugged.  
"Yeah, I know, _Black_, but I wouldn't count on it," she replied, winking in his direction before walking away with a little laugh escaping her lips.

"So, he apologized?" Marlene asked with a laugh, throwing then a candy in her mouth before shaking her head. "Unbelievable!" Dorcas arched her brows and took a bit of her chocolate bar as Jude shrugged, curling her lips for a moment before looking down.  
"Yeah, well, he wasn't the one who threw her into the lake," Lily said, monotone. "Nor did he called me –" she stopped, shaking her head before sniffing and taking a candy herself, stuffing it in her mouth and looking down, a little frown narrowing her brows.  
"Lils, please promise me you won't listen to another word that moron has to say," Jude quickly said, shifting her position and getting closer to her friend. "You've been too kind with him for too long, and I know you care about him but –" she took a little, shaky breath in. "You have to let him go," she whispered softly, quickly licking her lips and brushing Lily's hair out of her face, uncovering it. Lily didn't look at her for a few seconds and then pouted, lifting her gaze and cocking her head to the side.  
"It's not that easy, Jude – he's the only one who helped me when it all first started, and I've put so much trust in him it's hard to just let it – let _him_ go," she sighed and Jude wrapped her arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer.  
"I know baby, but remember that you have us now," she pouted almost mockingly, trying to cheer her up just a little and Lily scoffed.  
"Tell me that again when you and Sirius will get together and you'll totally forget about us," she mumbled with a little voice, almost imitating a child – in response, Jude blushed violently and moved from her, parting her lips in a shocked expression.  
"What are you talking about?" she questioned in a high-pitched tone and, as Lily laughed softly, Marlene threw a candy in Jude's direction.  
"Oh, you know!" Marlene said, laughing more loudly and dragging Dorcas alongside her. "He came all the way to your Common Room just to apologize for something he didn't do, so he could have an excuse to talk to you like he _always_ does," she curled the tip of her nose and leaned forward, smiling widely. "He's clearly head over heels for you, and you don't seem to despise him," she added then, moving up and down her brows in an amused expression. Jude, ignoring her burning face, shook her head.  
"I barely tolerate him, shut up," she mumbled, tucking her hair behind both her ears. "He's annoying and arrogant, always acts like a child and thinks he's superior and just the smartest and –" she stopped, waving her hands in a dismissive move just to try and avoid the subject she had just risked to keep going with her comment.  
"Well you seem to pay enough attention nevertheless," Dorcas said in a low voice, almost mumbling, and received a candy thrown exactly on her forehead in response, to which she replied with a little _ouch_.  
"You know I might suffocate you in your sleep, right?" Jude questioned her roommate, tilting her head to the side and looking right in her direction. Dorcas scoffed and took the candy that fell on her lap.  
"That would just prove my point," she said with satisfaction before taking the candy in her mouth, grinning and cocking her brows. In response, Jude pouted again, muttering a low _sure_ and then looking down, playing with the tips of her hair – because of them, she now couldn't stop thinking about it. Again and again. And to think that they'd organized all that too cheer Lily up, instead it had come to bite her in the back – at least it seemed to have worked by the way Lily's cheeks were reddish with amusement. A little smile ghosted Jude's lips, but she said no more: she didn't have to, even as they mocked her, and thought completely wrong of her feelings – of course she didn't hate Sirius just like she didn't hate any of the other _Marauders_, but the less she had to do with them (_with_ _him_) the better. Deep down she found the way they almost tortured Piton amusing – wrong, but still amusing. And after the way he'd talked about Lily, and deep down even the fact that he had thrown her inside the Lake contributed to the feeling of hatred growing higher and higher inside of her.

Jude woke up at the soft, delicate, familiar sound of Dorcas' shouting. Every morning the girl complained about being late – _which she never was_ – and every morning she woke Jude up too soon for her. She complained, hiding her head behind the pillow and letting out the same cry of _every morning._  
"One day I'm going to wake you up like this, then you'll understand why I want to slap you so bad," she mumbled, rolling out of bed with a sigh and walking slowly to grab her clothes.  
"You're never going to wake up before I do," Dorcas grinned, jumping on the spot as she tried to fit in both her shoes at the same time. "And you're also going to be late," she added, fixing her tie. The girl looked at her frowning, and it took her a few moments to realize no one else was in the room besides them. _She was actually late._  
"What the _hell_, Dorcas!" she complained, fastening her steps.  
"You're gonna be fine," her friend said, leaving the room with a grin on her lips. Jude started babbling in Spanish something that sounded vaguely like a curse as she got ready, her skirt too high on her waists, the buttons of her shirt not matched, her shoes loose and the tie's knot that looked more like a ribbon. She rushed out of the Ravenclaw Tower and almost fell on the stairs, trying to give herself a tone while running – which was an actual challenge. All of a sudden, the stairs moved and she slipped on it, falling miserably before grabbing hold of the runner next to her.  
"You've gotta be f –" she started in a growl when a little laugh from behind her stopped her.  
"You should watch your mouth, Mendoza – these pictures like gossip," Sirius was sitting on the stairs, his hair ruffled as much as hers, except he didn't look like a tornado threw him in the air before spitting him on the ground. "Are you okay?" he asked then, getting up and moving towards her when she gave no answer.  
"Yeah, I'm just gonna punch one of my dearest friends," she replied, rolling her eyes, and Sirius laughed again – Jude realized how much she liked his laugh and slightly blushed at the thought, looking away from the boy.  
"You won't be able to reach the class in time, you know that, right?" he questioned then, the ghost of a smile still on his lips as he held out his hand for her. Jude sighed and took it, letting him pull her up with a single, fluid movement. She quickly placed her free hand on his chest so she wouldn't fall again – _on him_ – and tensed slightly at the closeness between their bodies, _again_.  
"I know," she squealed before clearing her throat, taking a step back and fixing at least her skirt. "But I would've if these damn stairs had less sense of humor." As if they heard her, they moved again and she stumbled back from Sirius, hitting her back on the runner before her body got trapped between it and Sirius' own body. He had his arms at her sides, blocking her every movement.  
"I think they got offended," he laughed softly, _too_ close to her face. He was trying so hard to hide how fast his heart was beating – it felt like everybody could hear it, rushing in his chest and pushing against the rib-cage like he wanted to get out. "May I?" he asked then, pointing at her tie and cocking his head to the side. The girl blushed slightly and looked away, avoiding his gaze. _Please look at me_, he thought. _Please, Jude._  
"I know how to tie a knot," she protested, her voice surprisingly still. He grinned and moved his hands from the runner to her, slowly.  
"I'm not saying you don't," he replied calmly, untying it and letting the two edges fall on her chest. She had skipped a button below her neck – when she said nothing, he proceeded to open the first two buttons to fix it, and the girl froze for a moment. When his fingers gently brushed the skin of her neck she sighed closing her eyes, and unconscionably tilted her head back, enough to give him space. Sirius' heart leaped in his chest, and for a moment he was afraid his knees would give up.  
_Anyone could see us_, she thought, incapable of forming any other reasonable thought. _See what?_ She questioned herself then, before feeling the heat from Sirius' body fade. When she opened her eyes, he was watching her, a strange look in his eyes – she cleared her throat and gazed away again.  
_Please look at me_, he thought again, and could feel the begging in his own inner voice.  
"_Gracias_," she mumbled, looking down, the hair covering her burning cheeks. He wanted to get close again, to brush it away from her face just so he could keep studying her traits – what was about her that _attracted_ him so much?  
She was afraid that if she kept standing just there, she would've looked like a fool – she was also afraid that her legs were going to give her up as soon as she'd tried to move. _But she could risk it._ When he didn't reply, she almost rushed down the stairs – _I'm not going to fall, I'm fine, everything's okay, nothing happened_. She could still feel his gaze on her neck and every cell of her body was screaming at her to go back, to wait and come to terms with her feelings – what were those feelings anyway? What was actually happening to her? Dizzy, she closed the Library's door behind her hoping everything else could remain out of that room.


	2. 2

"Black, are you in need of something strong? Like a coffee? Or a bucket of cold water?" Jude looked over her shoulder to where Sirius was sitting, his head almost on the table and dark circles surrounding his eyes. They all looked tired – _the Marauders_ – but Sirius seemed to haven't slept in years. Remus wasn't even there, and Jude couldn't help but wonder what happened.  
"I'm sorry, professor," he mumbled, sitting straight after stirring his back. The professor simply snorted and returned to the last notions they needed for the practice, and Sirius' head fell over again for a few seconds. He rubbed his eyes and repressed a yawn before looking around, like he'd just realized where he was – then he met Jude's gaze and smiled tiredly. She returned the smile before trying to pay attention to the lesson again, but it was hard to focus with Sirius so close. It had been like that for months now, and she had gotten to the point where her feelings were so messed up she actually had to stop in the middle of everything she was doing or everywhere she was to take a deep breath in and come back. _What have you done to me? _She always asked herself whenever she and Sirius talked, met, or simply saw each other from afar. _What have you done?_  
Dorcas elbowed Jude and she frowned, looking at her friend with a confused expression.  
"What's going on with you?" Dorcas asked in a whisper, looking every now and then at the professor.  
"Nothing," Jude lied without meeting her friend's gaze and scribbling down a few words – luckily, nothing of that all had messed with her schooling.  
"It doesn't seem like _nothing_, it seems like your head is always elsewhere," the other girl replied fast, and Jude scoffed, trying not to pay attention to her. "Or with somebody else," she added, glancing behind Jude's shoulder where Sirius was still trying to wake up.  
"Shut up," Jude hissed back, but her face heated up nonetheless and Dorcas couldn't help but grin.  
"Now, let's pair up and see if you understood a single word I said," the professor said. "Black, why don't you join miss Mendoza here in the front?" he asked, and Sirius almost fell from his chair. "Be kind, miss Meadowes, find another seat," he added, and Jude had to cover her face to hide the fact that she was blushing again. _Of all people_ – the world just seemed to be against her yet again.  
"_Oh my God_!" Dorcas hissed getting up; she glanced at the professor and then back at Jude. "You have _so_ many things to tell me," she pointed at her friend and then walked away thrilling with excitement. Jude let go of a little cry, and pressed her hands on her eyes before looking up to where Sirius was now standing, looking at her in confusion.  
"I'm sorry," she mumbled and moved in Dorcas' place so he could sit next to her. "Are you okay?" she asked then as he held his head with his hand.  
"I'm too tired to give a witty response to that," he mumbled, his eyes half-closed and a little pout curling his lips. "Boys night, you know," he added then, looking at Jude with the only eye he could manage to keep open. "Thing got – uh, pretty wild," he said before shaking his head and rubbing his eyes again. "I'm sorry, I'm babbling, thank you for asking," he quickly said looking at her, his eyes slightly red – Jude wished that was the reason she got distracted by them, but she'd never seen eyes that looked like melted silver and she thought she might've seen her own reflection in them if she'd looked close enough.  
"Yeah, right," she said after a few moments, clearing her throat before forcefully moving her gaze to her notes. "Let's just – let's focus on this," she added, tucking her hair behind her ears.  
"Do I make you nervous?" he asked all of a sudden and she almost jumped on her seat.  
"What?" she asked back in a high-pitched tone, making the boy smile slightly. He reached for her hair, taking a small lock of it between his fingers.  
"Whenever you answer a question in class you tuck your hair behind your ears because you're nervous, or when you have to speak up to someone," he explained slowly, playing gently with her hair with his head cocked to the side. "It's like you're trying to show that you're not intimidated by them." Jude scoffed and reached for her hair, stopping midway.  
"I'm not intimidated by you," she replied hastily, snapping her tongue. "What are you now, anyway, some sort of psychologist?" she asked then, shaking her head and freeing from his light hold. He laughed softly and leaned slightly towards her.  
"But I do make you nervous," he said, almost mockingly. She snorted and rolled her eyes in response.  
"That's not what I said," she looked at him then, her mouth a little, nervous line.  
"That's not what you didn't say either," he replied with a smirk, and his fingers gently brushed her cheek that, little by little, got red. Jude hardly noticed Dorcas almost falling from her seat a few desks behind them, her mind suddenly rushing because of his touch – _a single touch_.  
"Stop it," she hissed, moving her head and gazing down to her papers. "You don't make me nervous, but you're starting to annoy me," she added and when the professor cleared his throat to dismiss the class, she got up quickly, grabbing her stuff and ignoring Sirius' voice calling her name. She walked away shaking, and ignored Dorcas too as she called her trying to stop her – James Potter followed her with his gaze and frowned when he suddenly saw Sirius run after her, still calling her.  
"Jude, please stop," he exhaled tiredly and she slowed down, chewing down at her bottom lip before stopping and turning in the boy's direction. "I'm sorry if I offended you, I didn't mean to I – I'm really tired, I don't know what I'm talking about," he mumbled and got closer to her, twitching his hands as if he'd wanted to touch her again. _He really did. Why?_  
"Right," she sighed and looked down. "Okay, fine, but I have to go – skip the next class, Sirius, you should rest."  
And he looked in silence as she left – _Sirius, Sirius_.

"Were you going to tell us?" Lily's voice reached Jude's ears and made her cringe on the spot. She curled her lips for a moment, took a long breath in and then turned toward her friend with a huge, innocent, smile on her lips.  
"Tell you what?" she asked, naively, leaning on the table of the library. Lily sat next to her as Marlene scoffed and took place on her other side. Dorcas reached the other side of the table and smiled gently in Jude's direction, who sent her an ice-cold gaze.  
"Oh you know!" Marlene almost yelled, crossing her arms. "You being all lovey dovey with Black!" she added, pocking at her side. Jude blushed violently and looked away from her, fixing her eyes on her notes and biting her bottom lip.  
"I'm not _lovey dovey _with _anyone_," she mumbled, tucking her hair – she stopped again, thinking about Sirius' words. Then she mentally cursed because she was thinking about _him_.  
"You blushed in class and you're blushing again, dear Jude, so are you sure?" Dorcas asked, and Jude glanced at her again, nervously.  
"Yes, because you're embarrassing me with all this _insane_ stuff about S –" she stops herself, biting the tip of her tongue. "Black. About Black," she sighed, shaking her head and making her friends giggle.  
"Oh, it's _Sirius_ now?" Lily asked in a sweet voice, gently touching her cheek before pressing her finger on it. Jude snapped it away with a single gesture, snorting and looking down again on her notes.  
"Think whatever you want," she said in a mumble. "You'd do that anyway, so," she rolled her eyes and bit her bottom lip. Lily pouted before wrapping her arms around her friend, her head tilted so she could meet her gaze.  
"You know we're just messing with you? We made fun of Dorcas for her crush as well," she told her with a grin, glancing at the girl nominated who smacked her lips.  
"I don't have a crush!" Jude complained, throwing her hands in the air – her tone a bit too high. Everyone in the library looked at her, some frowning, some complaining, some with curious amusement. Jude blushed again and looked down as someone yelled back a _good to know_ that made her friends laugh unwillingly. "Listen, just because I don't want to punch him the face it doesn't mean I would date him or anything – he's not a moron and that's it, it's not like I have a crush on you too for this," she sighed, swinging her hand around as if she was indicating her friends.  
"That's just a pity," Marlene replied, ruffling Jude's hair jokingly. "We would make an awesome couple, you know?"


	3. 3

"Sirius?" James called him, probably for the thousandth time that day since the moment he arrived at Potter's house. "Sir, are you okay?" he asked, and the boy rolled on his side. It was hot and the covers glued on his skin for a few seconds.  
"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied in a mumble. "I mean – I don't know, I never thought this would happen," he looked down, incapable of standing James' pitiful gaze.  
"You wanna talk about it?" his friend asked nervously – he didn't know how to act, he was just terribly worried about him. It was his house, his family, no matter how awful it could've been in the past.  
"I'd rather sleep a bit, actually," Sirius excused himself, rolling on his back again, but maintaining his eyes toward his friend. "Thank you for having me," he added with a soft smile. James smiled back but remained in silence after simply nodding. Sirius moved his head, closed his eyes and tried to ignore that heavy feeling on his chest, slowing his breathing to try and get some actual sleep now that he was in a _bed_. It took him an hour of tossing and turning, but when he finally fell asleep _he dreamed of Jude_.

Jude woke up nervous: she had got barely any sleep and those few minutes she'd managed to close her eyes and rest, Sirius' face had appeared in her mind. She wondered why – it was July, they hadn't seen each other in a while and wouldn't meet anytime soon, so _why _was she dreaming of him.  
"_Hola, chiquilla_," her mom entered the kitchen and placed a gentle kiss on her head – she groaned back, putting a tired smile on her face.  
"English, _mama_," she murmured, kissing her mother back on the cheek before sitting at the table. The woman babbled something in Spanish before getting closer to the window.  
"Have you seen that motorbike outside? Do you think James's the one driving it?" she questioned, moving the curtain a bit. Jude almost choked on her coffee.  
"What are you talking about?" she asked, turning in her mother's direction with her eyes wide open. She'd tried to not think about the fact James Potter lived next to her every single day, and her mother was always there to remind her.  
"It's there since yesterday, but I don't think it's much his style," she said and the young girl groaned, tilting her head down and hitting the table with her forehead. The woman turned in her direction and frowned. "Are you okay, _amor_?"  
"I slept badly," she just replied before getting up, chugging down the rest of the coffee in her cup. "I'm gonna go for a walk, maybe that'll wake me up," she added then with a smile, thinking that would probably fool her mom – the fact was that she didn't want her to know how much she'd actually thought about those boys in the past year, _one in particular_.

She wished that had remained just in her fantasies. That she'd just dreamed of him, at least until September arrived and they'd started school – and that remained just a wish.  
She'd been walking around for just ten minutes or so, her head down, completely isolated from the surroundings, when a hand grabbed her by her wrist. She turned around quickly, closing her other hand in a fist and throwing it in the air trying to punch the person behind her as a reflex – and she would've succeeded if they hadn't bent over, avoiding it in a single, graceful movement.  
"I thought you were friendlier, Mendoza," Sirius voice arrived muffled to her ears as he got up, stretching his back but not letting go of her wrist. "Is this the way to say hello to an old friend?" he asked then with a grin on his lips. She scoffed.  
"You shouldn't have reached for me like that," she replied, moving her arm away from him to cross it against her chest. His grin faded and he looked down for a second.  
"You're right, I'm sorry, I tried to call you but you'd kinda spaced out," he scratched nervously the back of his neck, ruffling the tips of his hair. Jude opened her lips to reply, hiding the confusion given from his excuses, but then curled the tip of her nose and tilted her head.  
"Yeah, I did, I was thinking about – wait, what are you doing here?" she stopped herself. _I was thinking about the dream I had about you, tonight_. "Oh, so that's your motorbike," she added then with a little nod, arching her brows – he smiled again, but it wasn't his usual, cocky smile, there was a sad note underneath it.  
"Might I ask you how you know about the bike?" he asked, tilting his head to the side. Jude blushed at the implication and then shook her head, tightening her arms around her chest.  
"I live next to the Potters, my mother was the one who first saw it," she rambled, and saw Sirius' smile turn into a shocked expression that, despite everything, made her laugh a bit. "Your good friend never told you?" she questioned then in amusement.  
"He didn't," Sirius mumbled, looking down and licking his lips quickly. Jude hated that her eyes flew to his mouth just to study his movements, and she forcefully looked away, taking a quick breath in.  
"You didn't answer," she said then, and saw yet again Sirius' expression change in the span of a second – there was a halo of melancholy around him that made Jude want to get closer to him, and try to push it away. It didn't fit him. "Wait, you don't have to if you don't want," she gently added, pushing one of her hands in his direction.  
"Things in my family aren't easy – not for me, at least," his fingers twitched as he spoke, and he seemed to reach for her just for a second before barely shaking his head. "So the Potters let me stay here, they – they took me in," he explained slowly. He wanted so bad to talk to her about _everything_ – the good and bad, what he liked and what he didn't, his hopes and fear. _The dreams she was in_.  
"Guess we'll see each other more, then," she smiled kindly, grabbed his hand for a single, quick, moment, and they both felt their heart rush in their chest. She turned around rapidly, moving her eyes from him and biting her bottom lip hard.  
_Jude wait_, he tried to say, moving a step in her direction. _Thank you for not pushing me – can we walk together?_ But his lips felt sewed together and not a single word formed.

"Did it ever cross your mind to tell me you and Mendoza are neighbors?" Sirius asked, pocking James side as he sat next to him on the bed. His friend frowned and looked up from his book.  
"I thought you were over it – and also that you didn't care right now," he replied simply, making Sirius look at him in confusion – not that James wasn't right, he _didn't_ thought about it a lot in the last period, especially not over the benches, but what about all the year that had passed?  
"Over it? What do you mean?" he questioned and James unconsciously frowned again, closing his book with a sigh.  
"You know, your crush for her or whatever, unless –" he stopped and widened his eyes as Sirius' face grew red. "Oh, Merlin! You still like her?" he asked in awe before bursting into laugh.  
"What? No! What?" Sirius babbled in a high-pitched tone, getting up and shaking his head, then proceeded to walk in circles in the room under the amused look of James.  
"Yes, you do," he replied. "You like _like_ her, it's not just a crush," he jumped up clapping his hands. "This is gonna be fun!"  
"Shut up, James! You're obsessed with Evans," he pointed at him with the result of him laughing only louder. Sirius covered his face and sighed loudly when the door opened and Euphemia stood there, frowning and glancing from one to the other.  
"Is everything alright, boys?" she questioned, a little confused. James was still laughing and waved dismissively, holding his stomach with his free hand.  
"We're fine, we're fine – hey, mom, why don't we invite Jude and Lydia over? We used to do that before I went to Hogwarts," he grinned and watched as Sirius' face started becoming paler and paler as his cheeks grew reddish, a horrified look in his eyes and his lips parted. Euphemia looked at him too and nodded slightly.  
"I see now – don't worry, Sirius dear, you'll just get teased a bit," the woman told him kindly and Sirius blushed a little.  
"What? Oh, I'm fine with it, no problem at all, nothing to tease here," he kept babbling, shaking his head and making James laugh again – the woman had to press her lips together to not laugh too, letting them arch in a small smile.  
"Sure you are, darling," she gently caressed his face, pulling his hair back from his eyes in a quick movement. "Well, let me know if you need something," she added then, leaving the room with a little sympathetic wink in Sirius' direction before closing the door behind her. Sirius turned in James' direction, who was still laughing, and pushed him on his bed.  
"I can't believe you," he pouted, sitting on his own bed with his arms crossed. James sighed a last, little, laugh laying back and shook his head just a little.  
"You know I got your back," James replied, turning his head in Sirius' direction. "If it makes you feel better, I think she's good for you – she used to put you in such a good mood."  
Sirius threw himself back on the mattress and hid his face against the pillow with a low growl.  
"I'm begging you," he said, his voice muffled by the pillow. "Please stop!"


	4. 4

Going back to Hogwarts felt terribly weird for both James and Lily. They had to witness their best friends awkwardly smile to each other in the train – since Jude insisted Lily shouldn't travel with Severus, nor speak to him anymore for all that mattered, and James insisted Jude just _had_ to travel with them, because there was enough room anyway, much to Sirius embarrassment. But he was glad for Jude sitting next to him with her head tilted back and her eyes closed as she now talked with Dorcas sitting right next to her. The only one who seemed actually amused by the whole situation instead of wearing a confused expression was Remus, who looked back and forth from a flushed James to a smiling but slightly annoyed Lily, and from a distracted, almost peaceful Sirius to a strangely relaxed Jude, whose knee brushed every now and then against Sirius' one. He wondered whether or not the four of them realized what was going on, the electricity that passed from one another and the almost picturesque image it created.

"You saw that too, right?" Dorcas was asking Marlene as they marched down the corridor directed to the Great Hall. "I mean, I've never seen her so -" she stopped, trying to find the right word.  
"Meek? Tame? Docile?" Marlene suggested, cocking her head to the side with a grin crossing her lips.  
"I was going to say at ease, but those work too," her friend mumbled. "You think something happened, don't you?" she questioned then.  
"Something happened _for sure_," the other one replied, nodding to her own words. "We just have to find out what."  
"They're neighbors now," Remus said, making them both jump and turn in his direction, almost blocking the whole flow of students. He arched an eyebrow and tilted his head. "Jude didn't tell you? That's all Sirius talked about since we met this morning – before you joined us, of course," he shrugged and then put on an impassible expression as Jude approached.  
"Shall we?" she questioned Dorcas, pointing at their table a row away from Marlene and Lily's – _and Sirius' as well_. Dorcas forced a smile and put an arm around her friend's shoulders, mouthing in Marlene and Remus' direction. _I want to know everything_. Remus laughed softly and looked away quickly. That year was sure going to be fun.

"What I'm saying -" Lily was trying to say, jogging behind a furious Jude. "Is that it's not the end of the world," she huffed a breath and looked behind her where Marlene and Dorcas were. "Jude, please, slow down," she cried then, and her friend's steps faltered a bit. Jude sighed and stopped, much to the other girls' relief, and turned to face them with her arms crossed over her chest – she did that a lot, especially when they went over the topic _Sirius_. It was like a barrier she held in front of herself; Marlene had been the one who noticed that first, because she used to do that too.  
"Listen, we shouldn't have dropped the bomb like this, but it's been a year and you haven't told us anything," Marlene protested sounding slightly annoyed and getting closer. Jude sighed again and shook her head, looking away.  
"There's nothing to talk about, I told you – we get along well and this summer it happened that we met a few times because he lives there now, it's not a big deal," she replied. It wasn't a big deal, but his sad look and the way he almost seemed lost still confused her – that was the reason she hadn't told her friends about his moving. They didn't know he was living with the Potters, and there was no need for them to. Dorcas arched her brows and clicked her tongue slightly.  
"We know you better than anyone, Jude, you think we don't see that there's _something_?" she asked with a little smile, and when Jude gazed at her she lifted both her hands. "Look, you don't want to talk? Fine, we'll stop pressuring, but if Marlene opened up about her feelings you can too," she quickly said, receiving an offended _hey_ in response from the mentioned girl. Jude smiled slightly, looking down and loosening her arms.  
"It's not about that I – it's not my story to tell, I'm not trying to ignore my feelings or whatever, it's just there's more going on and it's not about me, nor you," she tried to explain, wrinkling the tip of her nose. They all looked baffled, and a wave of confusion passed over them.  
"You really care about him, don't you Mendoza?" Lily asked with a soft giggle and Jude couldn't help but smile, shrugging slightly.  
"It's not the end of the world," she mumbled with a little grin. _It wasn't the end of the world._

She never thought her sixth year would go by that quickly. The moment before it was September, then June again, and she was packing her bags to go back home. She'd studied like crazy, laughed, _worried_ – classes seemed just the same, the new Ravenclaws were nice and someone had asked her for help for studying, which made her glad. Her friends had stopped pocking at her sides whenever Sirius entered a room, and they'd mentioned him far less throughout the whole year – not that they didn't annoyed her about it every now and then.  
And then there was Sirius, who she realized she had a crush on – _and he accepted his own, much to James' disbelie__f__ –_ but that she tried not to bother too much, giving him enough space – _and all he wanted was to be with her, but every time he approached, she left with a __simple__ smile_.

He saw her, standing in the middle of the desert hallway with a book in her hands, sitting with her legs crossed on her trunk. She had spaced out, _again_, and Sirius couldn't help but smile as he approached quietly. _He was gonna be late._  
"Hey you," he said quickly, placing one hand beside her. She jumped on the spot, closing her book with a loud stunk and looking at the boy with her eyes wide open.  
"_Dios, ¿estàs loco?_" she asked in a high pitched tone, lifting one hand on her chest and releasing a breath. Sirius grinned slightly – _I like it when you speak in Spanish, even if you probably insulted me_.  
"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," he said instead, flapping his eyelashes innocently. Jude tilted her head back and sighed, closing her eyes for a few second before taking a long breath in, turning in his direction. "It's easy to, tho, you tend to space out quite a lot," he arched his brows and she pouted slightly in response.  
"That's true, but it's not a valid reason," she mumbled, leaving the book at her side and laying her arms over her legs, bending slightly over and pressing her palms on her cheeks, holding her head. "Are you okay?" she questioned then in a sweet tone that almost made him shiver. Sometimes he forgot she knew enough to feel bad for him, and at the same time wanted to tell her how everything in his life just seemed _wrong_.  
"Yeah, fine – I'll stay at James'," he mumbled, looking away for a moment before clearing his throat and meeting her gaze again. She was smiling slightly, her head cocked to the side and a lock of her hair falling over her eyes. "I guess it's going to be an interesting summer, just like the previous one," he added in a lower tone, moving his hand to tuck her hair behind her ear. Jude straightened her back, blushing ever so fairly and pressing her lips together 'til they formed a thin line.  
"That's – good," she babbled, her tone changing from high-pitched to normal-ish as she pulled the hems of her shirt, forcing herself not to pull back her hair. "I think I forgot something in my room," she quickly said, jumping off the trunk and taking a few steps back from Sirius' body. She looked at him, glanced at his lips titled in a grin, then nodded quickly and walked away,  
"Are you going to leave this here?" he asked, pointing at her trunk. She looked over her shoulder, took her wand and swirled it in the air – just like that, it started following her as she jogged down the corridor, her face still heated. _It was going to be an interesting summer._


	5. 5

"Hey, Jude," Sirius' voice song-called her and she stopped with a sigh to turn in his direction. He was on his motorbike and his usual grin crossed his lips as he stopped next to her on the side of the road. "You know there's a song that goes like this?" he added immediately after, humming then a few notes that made Jude smile and shake her head.  
"Are you following me now?" she asked him, arching one of her brows before tilting her head to the side. He grinned and scrolled his shoulders, leaning a bit on the front of the bike.  
"I haven't seen you all summer," he just replied, as if it was an answer to her question – he then straightened his back and moved his head a bit. "Come one, I'll give you a ride," it wasn't a question, but she shook her head again.  
"I've been busy – and I'm not getting on that _thing_," she said back. "And you haven't answered," she added quickly making him laugh, his head titled back and his eyes half-closed.  
"I thought you softened a bit, Mendoza!" he giggled, receiving a snort as an answer. "If I say I wasn't following you will you let me take you home?"  
Jude clicked her tongue and took a step closer to him, crossing her arms over her chest.  
"I can walk," her voice was lower, and a little, cocky, smile curved her lips as she leaned over. Sirius smiled back.  
"I'm not saying you can't," he imitated her tone and she pressed her lips together, flashing one hand to her face to tuck her hair behind her ears – she remembered a similar situation, just a couple of years before, with them on the stairs. Sirius let go a laugh. "See? I definitely make you nervous," he joked, and she rolled her eyes before getting on the bike behind him.  
"You better be very good at driving this thing," she mumbled and he laughed again, shaking his head.  
"Stop calling her a _thing_," he protested and without even looking back knew what expression was painted on her face. "Yes, I call her a she – now hold on," he quickly said, taking her hands she had laid on her knees to wrap her arms around his torso. He stopped for a moment, glancing back at her, and couldn't repress the smile that formed on his lips as she gently placed her head on his back. He kept his hands over hers for a while, then shook his head and put them on the handlebar to start driving. At first he felt her tighten her hold on him, squeezing his ribs and making him giggle slightly.  
"It's not funny," she mumbled against him and her words got lost in the wind – he laughed then, removing one hand from the handlebar to lay it on hers _just_ for a few seconds. In a first moment she tensed, then gently brushed her fingers against the palm of his hand before he put it in place again.  
"It kinda is," he replied with a grin, even if he knew she couldn't see him. "Relax, Mendoza, I intend to bring you home safe and sound," he added immediately after. She had her chin on his shoulder trying to look at him and at those words she just smiled, half-closing her eyes before laying her head again against his back – she still held tight, but felt her body calm down. She could feel Sirius' heart beat under her palms and curled her fingers a bit, wrinkling his shirt and making him smile wider; his heat, his heart and the barely perceptible movement of his shoulders lifting as he breathed lulled her and she closed completely her eyes, feeling actually safe for the first time in a long time, even on what she considered a death machine on wheels. She didn't even realize when it came to a halt, and Sirius didn't bother to tell her, just enjoying her arms around him. Moments passed and she opened her eyes quickly when a bike passed next to them trilling – reluctantly, she let go of him, slowly and with a fair shade of pink colouring her cheeks.  
"See? Everything went perfectly fine," he joked and she pouted slightly. In that moment, Sirius' heart leaped and he felt the sudden urge to lean over her and kiss her. He shook his head, pushing the thought away. Jude slid down of the bike and fixed her rumpled clothes before looking at her place and then back at him, biting her inner cheek.  
"Wanna come in?" she asked, tucking her hair behind her ears. Sirius quickly hid the grin that movement inspired. "I mean, I noticed the Potters aren't home," she added rapidly in a mumble before clicking her tongue. _What on earth are you doing, Mendoza?_ She questioned herself, wanting _so bad_ to slap herself.  
"Gladly," he replied, and Jude had to disguise quickly her confusion. She then smiled softly and turned to reach her front door – Sirius had to rush to keep up, and noticed how everything was closed and it seemed as if no one had been there the whole day. "Your parents aren't home?" he asked, looking around. Jude shrugged.  
"Mom's at work, she'll come back before dinner," she said quickly, closing the door.  
"And your father?" Sirius wondered with curiosity. Jude's shoulders straightened and her face tensed, making him regret his question. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to –" he mumbled, moving an inch closer.  
"It's okay," she replied with a forced smile on before shaking her head while clearing her suddenly dry throat. "I just never got to met him, he passed before I was born," her voice toned down and she realized he was the first person she told that out loud. Her friends knew, of course, but it wasn't because of her and they didn't know the dynamics, nor the whole story. Sirius face went pale, but Jude smiled nevertheless and kept talking – _she needed that and never realized_. "He was in Cuba for a vacation, one month became two, then three, then six – they met where _mama_ used to work and he asked her to go on a date after a week, saying he felt completely bewitched by her," she giggled at the thought, looking down at the floor and chewing her bottom lip for a few seconds. Sirius wondered if he was to say something, but every word he thought remained trapped in his throat, and his body didn't seem to want to move. "Eventually he had to go – come back to England, because he needed to fix some unfinished business so he could definitely move there and they could get married as they'd planned but," her voice faltered and she had to shake her head to focus. "The plane crashed in the middle of the ocean so – I have my father's name," she shrugged again and wrapped her arms around her body, shaking again her head and taking a few steps sideways, chewing her cheek again. Sirius' brain was working at a thousand miles when he wrapped his own arms around her – he didn't even realize he got closer enough to hold her. She froze at first, bewildered by his gesture, then closed her eyes again to drown in his scent, clinging to his shirt and taking a deep breath in before hugging him back.  
"I'm so sorry," he whispered, placing a gentle kiss atop of her head and holding her tight. "Jude –" he then murmured, his voice raspy sending chills along her back. She looked up at him, her heart leaping in her chest as she noticed _how close_ they were; Sirius brought a hand to her face, gently caressing her red cheek and stroking away the hair curled on her forehead. _Jude_, her name danced on his lips slowly, dragging her closer and closer, brushing then against her skin – they were close, so close she could see the shadow of a beard on his jawline, _so close she could kiss him_. _So close he could kiss her. _"Jude," he repeated, leaning forward.  
"Jude, _chiquilla_, are you here?" her mother's voice broke between the two of them, making them jump back and look away from each other. "Do you know why the motorbike is parked outside – oh, hello," the woman noticed Sirius and titled her head before looking at her daughter – her face flushed as she looked down on the floor. "Am I interrupting something?" Lydia asked, making Jude blush even harder and shut her eyes in embarrassment.  
"I was just going away," Sirius quickly said, his voice still a bit husky sending shivers down Jude's spine – he turned in her direction and she met his gaze. "See you around, Jude – ma'am," he nodded before walking away. Jude quickly turned her back to her mother who, as soon as she heard the door close, started laughing.  
"I suppose that's the infamous Sirius Black," she joked, making Jude growl in frustration as she covered her face. "Dorcas was right, he does look good," she added and her daughter cried out.  
"_Ma!_" she protested, her face now burning. She was glad she could hear the rumble of the motorbike getting away from her front yard – _that was a close call._ Sirius stopped the motorbike a moment before crashing it against the mailbox of the Potters. He cringed at the sound the wheels made on the ground and frowned: what was he thinking?  
He looked behind him where Jude's house was and smiled, half-closing his eyes because of the sun setting in front of his eyes – he'd noticed, in that light, that her hair weren't completely brown, but had a few red highlights in it. He had felt the urge to lock his fingers between it, brushing it gently as they got closer and closer, just like a few minutes before – they were _so close_. She smelled like strawberries and sun, and her eyes looked darker that close. He felt as if he'd just seen her for the first time. His skin burned where she'd touched him, so gentle and delicate, almost fearful – what was she thinking? Was she thinking about kissing him like he did? Her lips called him without moving and he wanted to reply so bad. Then he froze: she'd just opened up to him; why? He'd never thought she founded him so trustworthy, and yet there she was, telling him a story that broke her heart. _Why? Jude, sweet Jude. Why?_


	6. 6

That year felt like hell for Jude, and it was _just_ started. She hated December, she hated Christmas season because the school always emptied, but at least she got to spend it with her friends. _And with Sirius_. They never talked about what happened at her place – what she said nor what _almost_ happened. And while Jude kept it all by herself, not wanting to tell the whole story to her friends just yet – she wasn't ready -, the Marauders knew everything. _Almost_ everything. Sirius told them about driving her home, the feeling of her arms around him, how she'd opened up about her story – _I can't tell you this, it's not my story to tell_ – and how he felt about her. For a moment he thought they were going to make fun of him, or laugh, but they didn't. Remus smiled, ruffled his hair and muttered a _knew it_, James grinned rubbing his hands together, and Peter simply smiled. It was freeing to do so, and Sirius immediately felt better around them – and around Jude. The boys noticed how he always looked for her, and smiled the moment he just spotted her hair – the girls wondered what caused the soft blush on their friend's cheeks, even if they had their theory, and saw how her mood improved when she spent a few moments with a certain Gryffindor.

"I need you to come with me tonight," Lily murmured leaning towards Jude, and she frowned turning in her direction.  
"_Tonight?_ What are you planning, Evans?" she replied, confused. "Wait, are you finally dating Potter and you need help?" she grinned then, and a fair blush spread on Lily's cheeks who then shock her head.  
"We're doing a friend's night – us four and the boys, Dorcas already agreed," she winked and Jude's jaw dropped for just a few seconds before she curled the tip of her nose.  
"And how exactly are we going to do that?" she questioned with a little snort; Lily's only reply was a mischievous grin.

"I still don't get how you managed to let us sneak in," Dorcas mumbled sitting on the floor and grabbing the edge of the blanket wrapped around Marlene's legs just to pull it over her own, slightly leaning in the other girl's direction. Lily smirked and squeezed excitedly Jude's arm before pushing her down between herself and Sirius, who slid a little so that she won't fall _directly_ on his lap.  
"A mage never reveals his tricks," James said dramatically, sitting next to Lily, their arms touching slightly – Lily blushed and looked at a grinning Jude who was, unconsciously, leaning with her back towards Sirius who couldn't move his gaze from her, a faint smile painted on his lips.

Jude looked around in amazement the Common Room that looked so different from the Ravenclaw's one, and every now and then gazed at Sirius next to her, just to find him looking at her too.  
"So – truth or dare, who wants to start?" James asked, clicking his tongue.

"Alright, Black," Marlene said, clapping her hands and moving so she could face him, a vicious grin cutting her face. "Truth or dare?" she asked, and the expression she made straight after almost made Sirius shiver.  
"Truth," he moved slightly on the spot, accidentally hitting Jude's shoulder with his own.  
"Are you into someone? Like, not a dumb crush, but a crush _crush_," she arched her brows, her smile growing more and more. Sirius quickly gazed at Jude next to him, hoped no one saw it as his face heated and then huffed a breath.  
"Yes," he said, then gazed away. "Peter, truth or dare?" he asked and the only reply he got was a thunder of protests from the small group gathered on the floor – _everyone except Jude, _who looked at him with a little frown, her lips pressed in a thin line.  
"You can't just say _yes _and then move on like that!" Lily protested, waving her hand in Peter's direction to shut him.  
"I second that, who's it?" Dorcas asked excited, leaning forward him and crossing Marlene's legs.  
"Yes, Sirius, who's it?" Remus said again in an amused tone, receiving a sharp gaze in response.  
"That's two questions, you can only ask one – _Peter_, truth or dare?" he snorted before tilting his head. Jude was looking at him in silence, and he could feel her gaze on the side of his neck like she was kissing him and shrugged, sucking a breath in.  
"Dare," Peter replied after becoming sure he could – Marlene and Dorcas were still complaining about Sirius' silence, and the poor boy looked like he wanted to combust. A smile ghosted on Sirius face and he clasped his hands together.  
"I dare you to kiss the prettiest girl in the room," he cooed. "And notice I charitably said _girl_ and not _person_, because let's face it, I'd smoke all of you," he grinned, pointing at the girls, and Marlene smacked him on the back of the neck – the sensation of Jude's eyes on him persisted, but he tried to ignore it as Peter blushed violently for just a moment. He looked at Sirius, then moved from his seat.  
For a moment, Sirius panicked because he thought he was about to kiss Lily when she was sitting _right_ next to James, after he had planned the night so carefully, but he froze as his lips pressed against Jude's who almost jumped back in a rigid movement with a shriek. Everyone went dead silent, moving their gaze from Jude to Peter to Sirius, the blood completely drained from his face.  
"Oh, _Merlin_," Remus whispered, covering his face with his hands.  
"What the hell, Peter?" Jude snapped, brushing her fingers on her lips. The boy sat on his heels and tilted his head, ready to reply, but the girl shoot her hand up and stopped him. "You know what? It doesn't matter, I don't care," she got up and brushed her clothes, mumbling to herself.  
"Jude, sweetheart, wait," Lily said gently, moving to take the other girl's hand, but the latter just shook her head, frowning a bit.  
"No – I'm sorry Lils, I had fun and I'm glad you managed to plan this, but I wanna go," she talked fast and kept shocking her head before stopping, taking a little breath in. "It just became stupid," she muttered at last and then walked away, wrapping her arms around herself. Dorcas was about to get up and follow her quickly, but Remus placed his hand on her arm – he wasn't looking at her, but at Sirius. James noticed so too.  
"Sirius, why don't you go with her?" he asked slowly and Peter opened his lips to say something, but Marlene quickly threw a pillow at him to shut him up_._  
Sirius felt like he couldn't move and James voice arrived muffled at his ears as he felt the door of the Common Room close. _It just became stupid_. Her voice ran in his head again and again and he just wanted to hit Peter in the face but knew she was talking about him too.  
"Sirius," Lily's voice drilled in his ears as she gently touched his shoulder and he looked at her confused. "Go with her," she smiled encouragingly. The boy frowned and then got up, brushing his clothes nervously. As he walked towards the exit he felt Remus and Peter talking to each other – _I'm sorry, he told me to! _\- almost fighting –_ oh so if he told you to jump from the Astronomy Tower you would? –_ and sighed.

He stopped by the door to take a breath in before pushing it with more force than he thought.  
"If you boys don't stop going around this late at night," the lady in the painting started to protest as Sirius stumbled over the exit.  
"We're sorry, madame," Jude's voice was soft and tired, but she was close. As the painting closed behind him he turned around and bit his bottom lip – she was looking at him from the wall, her arms still crossed over her chest and an annoyed expression painted on her lips. _But she also looked __sad. She looked like when she'd told him about her father__._ The woman in the painting nodded rigidly before turning her back to them, apparently going back to sleep. "Well?" she asked after a few moments of silence, waking Sirius up from his stasis.  
"I'm sorry," he quickly said and she arched both her brows. "I didn't think Peter was actually going to do it – not because of you, I mean I thought he would've refused," he babbled and the girl left out a little laugh that didn't seem amused at all.  
"It could've been Lily for all I cared, that wouldn't have made it any different – I didn't want to be kissed like that, _because_ of that and certainly not by him," her face turned red and she looked away from Sirius, tightening the hold of her arms around her. He took a step closer and she pressed her back against the wall taking a breath in, slowly. "I have nothing against Peter, he kind of made me a compliment, but that dare was dumb," she mumbled, pouting slightly. Sirius got even closer, his heart quickening in his chest – hers almost stopping due to his closeness. They'd been close before, but there was an electricity in the air that made her shiver.  
"How did you wanted to?" he asked slowly, his voice toned down in what sounded almost like a growl. She looked up at him and her breath caught up in her throat.  
"What?" she managed to whisper. _She hated the way she was feeling_. Everything seemed blurred, the ground moved under her feet and she felt the urge to grab something to hold on to.  
"To be kissed," his words caressed her face and she closed her eyes, licking her lips and loosening her arms as she tried to slow her breath. "How do you want to be kissed? By who?" every word crawled under her skin and she had to force herself to open her eyes again so she could search for his gaze – her arms fell completely loose on her hips before she took a step in his direction too, almost bumping into him. She was terrified, and everything swung, making she feel like she was about to fall: it was two in the morning, she wasn't next to her dorm by the slightest, they were in the middle of a space where anyone could see them, but _she wanted it so badly._ Before she could rationalize properly every thought, she stepped forward again and pressed her lips against his, slightly turned into a smile. His arms quickly wrapped around her waists, pulling her closer, and just a moment later she felt her back hit the wall again as he pushed her toward it, tilting his head slightly. Jude sighed against his mouth, shooting her arms up to his shoulders – her hands ran through his hair, almost as if she wanted to push him more and more against her, searching for more contact, more closeness, _more_. Her body thrilled against his and she let go another sigh when he parted, breathing rapidly and pressing his hands on her back.  
"I'm slightly mad that Peter got to do it before me," he whispered against her lips, pressing then little kisses on the corner of her mouth as he grinned. She hit his shoulder with an annoyed snarl and he laughed on her skin, sliding his lips down her jaw, then on her neck – _what was happening_?  
"Sirius," she cried softly, gently pulling his hair the moment his lips brushed against her collarbone. Her body longed for his touch, but she knew they had to stop. Sirius moved his head back reluctantly, looking up at her – she noticed his eyes seemed darker and bit her bottom lip, trying to steady her breath. He moved one hand from her back to her flushed face, slowly, caressing her cheek before brushing her hair away.  
"I'm sorry," he whispered, moving his head closer and brushing his lips on hers once. "I'd wanted to do this for quite a long time," he said in the same, low tone, kissing her lips softly.  
"But I kissed you first," she whispered back with a grin, the tip of her fingers between his hair. Sirius looked up at her, a smile ghosting his lips and his eyes shining with amusement.  
"I gotta say, I wasn't expecting that," he laughed softly.  
"You alone, boy," the lady in the painting snorted, making them both jump and jerk away from the wall still embraced. Jude looked up at the painting with her lips parted and a hand on her chest, as Sirius tried _very_ hard not to burst into laughs. "If you don't want them to find out you should take a step away from each other, it was difficult to keep them at bay," she added then and, without another word, opened the door of the Common Room. Lily and Remus walked past the entrance first, almost stumbling, with James and Dorcas right after; Jude tried to move a step away from Sirius blushing violently, but he tightened his grip around her waists, keeping her close.  
"I'm not letting you go now," he whispered against her skin, gently pushing his fingers on her hip.  
"If they're making out I'm not moving," Marlene protested from behind all of them, making Dorcas laugh and jump on the spot, wrapping her arms around Lily.  
"I would like to say I knew it – but we all did," James joked, crossing his arms with a smile cutting his face mischievously.  
"Shut up, Potter," Jude protested, hiding her face behind Sirius' shoulder.


	7. 7

"Sirius, I'm trying to study," the girl whispered, pressing her body against the chair and tilting her head to the side so that his head wouldn't be in the way of her notes, holding a feather with one hand and trying to gently push him back with the other. The boy had both his hands on her tight, massaging it slowly as he pressed soft and quick kisses against her neck and face and lips.  
"You're already so smart," he pleaded with a sigh, squeezing for a second her leg while pouting, so that his lips brushed once again at the corner of her mouth. "_Please, _Jude," he kept using the same small voice. Jude sighed loudly, dropping the feather and turning her head so that she would be facing him while crossing her arms against her chest, leaning back.  
"You're terribly annoying, you know that?" she replied sharply, pushing the hair away from her face before biting her bottom lip, trying to block the laugh that threatened to go out at his expression: his pout had grown bigger, and he was trying to show his _puppy eyes_. Jude smirked and hid her face behind her hands with another loud sigh before sitting straight, taking Sirius' face within her hands gently and pressing a quick kiss on his pout that immediately shifted into a smile. "What do you want?" she asked then, eyeing discreetly her notes.  
"You've been studying the whole day," he protested, sliding one of his arms around her waists while keeping one of his hands still on her leg, moving it down on her knee.  
"And you haven't," she stated, arching her brows before pinching the tip of his nose – he wrinkled it, half-closing his eyes for a second before shrugging.  
"I'm a natural talent – but don't you wanna go out?" he pouted again, leaning forward to press his lips on her again. And again. And again.  
"Get a room!" Lily's voice stopped him, much to Jude's annoyance. She rolled her eyes and then looked at her friend who'd just dropped her books in front of Jude's before sitting down, her hair a red mess curled on her head – Jude grinned, leaning forward and ignoring Sirius' soft protests.  
"Just because you and your _boyfriend_ don't have a hint of self-control doesn't mean we're all like you," she said mockingly, laying her elbow on the table and extending her chin on her hand. Lily frowned for just a second, then touched the back of her head and blushed violently, making Jude laugh. Sirius observed in silence, an amused smile spreading on his lips.  
"At least we weren't giving a show," she muttered clearly embarrassed as Jude kept laughing softly. The girl then proceeded to gather her things, shooting a look at Sirius that slightly moved away so she could get up.  
"You know I love you, Evans," she told her friend sweetly, walking around the table to leave a kiss on her flushed cheek before extending her hand towards Sirius. He got up right after, murmuring a _bye red_ as he passed next to Lily who still seemed to want to combust.

"So, I was thinking – am I?" Sirius asked, moving away from the wall the moment Jude got out of the Ravenclaw's Common Room where she'd dropped her stuff. She frowned looking at him as he gently wrapped his arm around her shoulders.  
"_Are you_ what?" she asked back, moving from his hold to look at him. For a moment – a single moment – he looked away, chewing at his lips before a little grin crossed his lips. They were still close, and he brushed the tip of his fingers against her hip.  
"Your boyfriend, am I?" his voice was lower, but Jude heard it clearly and froze slightly, gazing down before meeting his eyes – Sirius frowned at her worried expression. "I – I mean, it's been over a month, and we never actually talked about it and – Jude, is everything alright?"  
"Can we go outside? I don't want to talk about it in front of the pictures," she mumbled quickly, glancing at the frames next to them. Sirius nodded and, walking in silence, they headed outside the castle.

It was a warm, pleasant day, and they weren't the only ones who wanted to take advance of it, so they had to walk a relatively long way to avoid the other students – at least that seemed Jude's idea. Sirius followed her with his brows narrowed and an uneasiness graving on his chest, closing his throat. _What was she thinking? _Jude nervously fidgeted her fingers, curling the hem of her skirt before tugging it and stopping on the lake-shore, where she knew no one ever wanted to go – sometimes she remembered being thrown in the lake by Snape and was reluctant herself, but it was a quiet spot.  
"Jude, did I said something wrong?" Sirius asked after minutes of silence, taking a step closer. She turned in his direction, a smile ghosting her lips as she squinted her eyes slightly. "_Darling,_ I'm sorry, I –" he murmured and she shook her head quickly, taking one of his hands in hers. Compared to his, they looked like the ones of a child, but she intertwined their fingers and took a breath in.  
"You don't have to apologize about anything, nor you need to worry I just – I wasn't sure of what you _actually_ wanted," she scoffed, throwing her head slightly back and closing her eyes. "I wasn't even sure of what _I _wanted, but I liked how things were going and I didn't want to overstep, or say something I would regret, or –" Sirius stopped her by pressing his hand on her lips, and the look on her face made him immediately regret it.  
"Sorry, you were babbling and I need to say a thing," he mumbled, taking a step closer but not moving his hand. "You can say to me whatever you want, whenever you want – this might sound cheesy and silly and totally cliché but, Jude, I waited for you too long to make something like doubts make me get away from you _now_," he talked slowly and, as the tension dropped from her back and shoulders, he moved his hand from her mouth, gently brushing her hair right after while studying her traits quickly – he already knew it by heart, he would've recognized the fairy point of her nose everywhere, and knew exactly how her eyelashes brushed over her cheeks when she closed her eyes. "I can slow everything down if you want to, and if you don't know I'll wait as long as you need, I'm okay with that – you'll still be my best girl, even if you think you might overstep," he smiled slightly and she looked down, a fair blush spreading on her cheeks.  
"You shut me up like that again and I'll kick you," she told him, punching his shoulder before taking a step closer as he laughed softly, tilting his head. She had so much going on in her head she couldn't seem to form a single phrase, and had to take another breath in – _I like how things are going, I love it_, she wanted to say. _I love how you just told me that you waited for me, because I didn't know, and I'm terrified I won't live up to your expectations, but - _"I like your annoying face so much it actually scares me sometimes, and I need to be sure about everything, always – and yes, I am sure about," _about us, about wanting to be with you, to stay with you as long as I can and as long as you'll want me._ She gestured awkwardly between the two of them. "This, although I have no idea how it works," _but I wanna know. I wanna work it out even if I'm terrified, and I don't wanna be without you._ The truth hit her and she had to repress a shiver. _I don't wanna be without you. _She smiled softly before taking her hands to his face, getting on her tiptoes to let their lips meet slowly, gently – he wrapped his arms around her instinctively, but broke the kiss with a sigh, _he had to say it_.  
"You don't need to work it out now, we have time," he murmured, taking her close. "And you don't need to worry – _I got you,_" his voice toned down to a whisper, making her tremble in his embrace before taking her lips on his again, and again, and again.  
"But I won't mind calling you my boyfriend," she wrinkled her nose, pressing kisses on his face and making him laugh softly. He held her closer, one of his hands traveled to the back of her head and she stopped, meeting his gaze for the thousandth time.  
"So I found something Jude Mendoza doesn't know?" he asked with a smirk on his reddened lips. Jude rolled her eyes and hit his shoulder again, muttering a _shut up _under her breath before laying her head in the crook of his neck, closing her eyes and relaxing against him. _I got you_.


	8. 8

"The year is almost over," Dumbledore's words echoed through the room, making the student's voice drop as they carefully listened to him. "Which for some of you means exams that will lead you to your next year or –" his clear eyes lingered on the students, and Jude knew he was watching every single one who wasn't going to come back to Hogwarts next year – herself included. She shoot a glance in Sirius' direction and found him already looking at her. "Into the world," Dumbledore concluded is phrase nodding. Jude smiled at Sirius, who grinned back.

He wanted so bad to get up and go to her, just so he could sit by her side and hold her a little longer. _Merlin, when did he became so cheesy?_ Jude turned her gaze back at Dumbledore, a blush spreading on her cheeks as Dorcas pinched her sides, trying to talk to her – or, even better, get an answer back.

"You became even more annoying with your little secrets, Jude!" Dorcas tried to keep her voice down, but it was difficult as her friend looked straight ahead of her with a little grin on her lips, like someone who knew a thing nobody else could understand. She was looking at Sirius just a few moments before, then her whole body had stiffened and she had to look away, blushing and smiling like a child. _She had heard him._ Not his words, he'd said nothing, but his _thoughts_. Professors told her it was surprising her power showed off so suddenly, and that she was managing to keep it under control _so_ easily – legilimens tended to be very confused at first, and it took them years to do what she was able to. She was trying to not invade anyone's mind, but sometimes it was more natural to let their thoughts, their _desires_ flow in.  
"I promised I'll tell you and I will, stop being so impatient," Jude muttered at her friend without looking back. _Oh, maybe she's pregnant,_ Dorcas thought, and Jude had to bite her lips not to laugh – no one, except from professors and her mother, knew. Not even Sirius. At first she was too afraid to tell him – _hey, you know I can read your mind? I know everything you think of me or anybody else you see. I also cheated on a test once because I didn't know the answer but the person next to me did. __Just one question though!_She shook her head, trying to brush off the uneasiness that came with those memories. She then remembered Dumbledore's words as he explained her real power to her; _you either do a spell, which is pretty hard to master, or you're born with it. It's a gift, and you shouldn't feel bad for little hiccups in your path. You're going to keep it under control and use it just when necessary._  
"Is this about Sirius?" Dorcas asked, leaning in. "Are you moving together after school? Planning on getting married or stuff?" her friends asked again and again, making Jude's face heat up violently.  
"_Qué_?" she squirmed, and a few of her House mates glanced at her. She lowered her voice. "No! We're not!"  
"Lily and James seem pretty sure about doing it, excuse me if I have my theories," her friend acted offended, but Jude knew about the mischievous smile painted on her lips.  
"Of course they are, have you seen them? They can't be parted for too long, it's exhausting. But –" she stopped and sighed, quickly glancing at Sirius who was talking with Remus, his face brightened up with a laugh. "I'm not Lily – I'm not ready for such a thing, and he understands it – me," she looked at her hands, a little flower knotted as a ring dancing on her middle finger, and smiled again.  
"Are you sure?" Dorcas asked as Dumbledore finished his speech. They clapped and waited for the thundering noise to stop before going back to their discourse. "I've known you for years, and maybe it's true you're not ready and that's totally fine but – don't you think this might be because of your parents?" she asked carefully, and Jude tensed slightly before frowning. Her lips parted, as if she wanted to say something, then closed again she she tilted her head, confused. Dorcas sighed, looked at Marlene who arched an eyebrow, and gestured toward the exit. Marlene nodded slightly and touched Lily's arm, drawing her attention so that they could get all out. "Alright, come with me," Dorcas mumbled, taking Jude's hand and getting up. The girl followed her, still trying to process her words. _Because of her parents? Why?_

"You couldn't wait?" Marlene sighed once Dorcas and Jude met her and Lily. Dorcas snorted and crossed her arms after waving in Marlene's direction.  
"We're discussing this later – Jude, honey, are you okay?" Lily interrupted them and took a step in Jude's direction, who was still running her mind over Dorcas' words again and again. She parted her lips again, took a little breath in and scanned her friends quickly.  
"What does this mean? What has this to do with my parents?" her voice dropped slightly. Lily huffed a breath and brushed Jude's hair away from her face.  
"You told us you were afraid that would never happen to you, that you'll never love so strongly someone like they loved each other, or that you weren't capable of feeling that way," Lily's voice was gentle and an encouraging smile was painted on her lips – she reminded Jude of her mother.  
"I was just saying, I didn't mean to –" her voice trailed off and she frowned again. _Didn't she? __Was she actually afraid?_  
"But you really thought it – you still do," Dorcas pressed her arms against her chest and shook her head. "Look, I'm not saying you should really move in with him, or start a family right away, you've got all the time in the world to do so _if_ you want to, but it always seems like you're restraining yourself."  
"I'm not," Jude spoke before she could actually process Dorcas' words, almost as a reflex. She went silent and clasped her hands together, trying not to fidget nervously her fingers.  
"Are you? It took you years to realize you actually liked him, months for you to allow yourself to let go a little around him, and to open up to him about the way you felt," Marlene tried to slow down as her friend's eyes widened in fright – she'd always been the most brutally honest of them, and it was easier when Jude took her sides as she always tried to say the truth as it was; talking to her so directly felt a little bit harder than she thought, but she persisted. "I'm sure the poor boy never know what's on your mind, and is just as scared as you are, but you love each other in a way I never thought was possible and you're too caught up in your worrying to notice," she stopped abruptly and pressed her lips together, Dorcas' hands gently brushing her arms.  
"I –" Jude tried to say. _I don't love him? _That wasn't true. She loved him ardently, and she was terrified of it. _They were right_.  
"Your parents' story is tragically beautiful, but you don't have to live up to that – it's your story, yours and Sirius', and you should live it like you want to, like you _deserve_ to, not as if you're following a path that doesn't exist," Lily told her gently, and Jude tried to reply – _thank you, thank you –_ when Sirius' thoughts reached her, and he was looking for her. She smiled and unclasped her hands.  
"I'm a legilimens, that's what I had to tell you – yes, it means I know you thought I was pregnant," Jude looked at Dorcas who blushed and dropped her jaw. "I'm telling you like this because Sirius is right over that door and I need you to leave, _please_," she almost begged with her bottom lip trembling. Her friends looked as if a cold wave had ran over them, making Jude chuckle nervously as the door opened behind them and Sirius peaked his head out. A rush of confusion ran over the three's faces and they looked from the door to Jude and at the door again, then walked away with a _you'll better find a way to explain yourself, Mendoza, _leaving her alone for just a few moments.

Sirius reached her and pressed a gentle kiss on her cheek, making her eyelids flutter and arch her lips in a little smile.  
"Are you okay? Did something happen?" he asked slowly, a little note of worrying in his voice, running his fingers through the tips of her hair. She sighed under his touch, relaxing immediately as it always happened in his presence.  
"I'm fine," she replied nodding, wetting her lips before meeting his eyes. "I need to tell you something, can we go somewhere else?" she asked, eyeing the now-closed door. Sirius frowned but nodded, intertwining his fingers with hers as they went.

They reached a corridor that was almost unused, where the few pictures slept or couldn't talk and disturb them. They sat on the floor next to each other, and Sirius tried to stay as close as possible, terrified.  
"Listen, I know the exams are starting in a few days and you want to focus on studying, and that I can be annoying so I promise I won't interrupt your session and –" his next few words died between their lips as she shut him up, kissing him gently. "Don't leave me," he whined on her lips, making her part and laugh slightly.  
"I'm not trying to break up with you, Sirius," she pressed her fingers on his forearm and felt his body relax a bit; he leaned forward again, pressing a kiss on her lips again and again, until she pushed him away gently, shaking her head with another little laugh. "Stop it, just a moment," she told him, moving one of her hands to press it on his mouth. He pouted and complained, but moved back as she told him and wrinkled the tip of his nose. "Alright, let's try – think about something, anything, that you never told me, something that I don't know," she ordered, dropping her hands on her own lap. Maybe it would've been easier that way. She chewed at her bottom lip and tilted her head.  
"Something you don't know," Sirius mumbled, confused, and Jude nodded slightly. He hummed and looked up for a second, and Jude could feel the rush of thoughts in his mind mixing with her own – _something she doesn't know, something she doesn't know_. Then he seemed to grab a thing, and everything around it stopped as Jude blushed ever so slightly, leaning forward him.  
"_I love you too,_" she whispered, and Sirius' eyes widened. He opened his mouth, almost gasping for air, then frowned and closed his mouth again.  
"How did you," he tried to ask her in a low voice, then his eyes lit up with knowledge and Jude couldn't help but smile. "You're a legilimens, aren't you?" his voice still sounded like a whisper, but there was a hint of admiration in it. Jude nodded, her lips still arched – then Sirius face heated up and she had to cover her mouth not to laugh: it was the first time she saw him blush. "You mean you've heard everything I thought?" he asked babbling, almost terrified.  
"Not _everything_," she assured, her amusement clear. "I try and stay out of people's mind as much as I can but – sometimes it just happens," she shrugged, a grin now parting her lips as she moved closer to him. "Sometimes it's flattering," she giggled, and Sirius let go of a growl as he hid his face in the crook of her neck.  
"_Merlin_," he sighed, making her laugh a little louder. She moved again, wrapping her arms around him as she slid on his lap, aligning her body to his.  
"It's okay, don't worry," she said amused, tilting her head to gently kiss his cheek, trying to move her way to his lips. His mind was in a rush again, and he was trying not to focus on one thought for too long as her body got closer to his – instinctively, he wrapped his arms around her and then looked up. She was smiling, her cheeks a fair red and her lips bright pink, meeting his gaze with her eyes glittering.  
"I really do," he mumbled, pressing his palms at the base of her back, pushing her towards him. "Love you – I really love you," he peaked a kiss under her chin, making her tilt her head back and close her eyes.  
"I do too," she said back, her voice a breathless whisper as she ran her fingers through his hair and grinned. "I _really_ love you too." He pressed her against him, kissing her neck now all the way down to where her shirt started. He stopped for a moment, and she had to look down to him again. "It's okay – I'm okay," she mumbled, nodding and cupping his face so she could lean in and kiss him again. _And again and again_.


End file.
